5 Ways I’ve Failed in Life and Why That’s Okay

Hi pretties! Failing in life happens a lot- and that’s okay! Failure is not permanent. Not trying is permanent. Here are five ways I’ve failed in life, and why failing in life is normal and even okay! This post was inspired by Jess’s post.

I got dumped and then got back together

One of ways I’ve failed in life is having my partner dump me for a month before getting back together. At that time, we both realized what we had done wrong. I was too clingy and never let him have his own time. We both were pretty bad at communicating, me more so because of my neurodiversity. Eventually, we did get back together, and have now worked on our problems. We still have not done all the “normal” stuff a stereotypical couple would do. For example, moving in together, getting engaged and married, and so on. That’s okay, because we’re in no rush. I’ve learned that the more you rush things, the more terrible the outcome will be. I want our future to be as healthy and happy as possible.

I still live with my mom

Normally at the ripe old age of 30, people expect you to at least have moved out, but unfortunately, I have not. That’s another way I’ve failed in life. I have moved out once before, but hated the experience and moved home after 6 months of living on my own. I am currently on a waitlist to get a low-income apartment and I’ve been trying to save money, but my neurodiversity makes me impulsive and I end up draining my own account after 4 days (this is why I shouldn’t have money). This has led to me having to live with my mom, in addition to my disabilities (autism and ADHD). It’s a little bit embarrassing and ashaming to still be living with my mom at 30, but life is the way it is.

I’m not engaged or married yet

Another way I’ve failed in life is that I’m not married, much less engaged. At 30, most people expect you to be at least engaged, if not married. However, my partner and I are not ready for that part of life yet. We are both neurodivergent (he has undiagnosed ADHD, I have autism and ADHD), which makes life much more difficult to get through. Being engaged or married is a huge commitment for me. I’m just not ready for that stage in life yet, but I know when the time is right, I will be ready for it.

I haven’t used my college degree

I have a bachelor of science in criminal justice, and I still have not used it yet. The only times where it’s come in handy is researching cold cases out of boredom and listening to true crime podcasts. That is yet another way I’ve failed in life. Most people usually have some use for their degrees, such as a business major. However, I have yet to use my degree. I could theoretically get a certification in a field like criminal investigation or even cyber security. However, that would mean having to pay out of pocket for my schooling, as I’ve already used up all my grant money. Not using my college degree is okay, because there are plenty of people who also don’t use their degrees.

I spend money on things I like instead of saving

Instead of saving (my goal is to save a little bit each month this year), I have been spending all my money on things I like instead of saving. This is because I have no serious commitments right now, such as marriage or children. I have no desire to start a family, and I will move out of my mom’s house when the time is right. I know it’s a bit shameful for me to be buying things such as plushies, clothes, and shoes. However, they are my special interests, and it’s taken me so much courage to make my spaces the way I want them to be.

I shouldn’t have to hide parts of myself for the sake of saving money. I shouldn’t be afraid of spending my money because I want to speed things up. As aforementioned, I want to take life at my own pace rather than be stuck in the comparison trap and try to hurry my life along.

What are the ways you’ve failed in life?

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